Examples of Confusion

If it isn't funny, it probably isn't true.

"That’s why the more you like the Judy Garland film, the more you might appreciate Oz the Great and Powerful. Appreciate. Enjoy. Admire. Be glad to see. Have fun with … But as for love - well, love will be harder to come by." - Mick LaSalle on Oz the Great and Powerful and also on all the men in my life.

I catch myself saying to this or that ex, “where can I get one of these stupid little hats?”

All Lies

I’m getting together for coffee tonight with an ex to “catch up,” but mostly just to retrieve books I left at his house.

I’m going to tell this ex that I’ve quit smoking and drinking and that I’ve started running and working out and that I’m getting married.

Jacob and his fiends had prospered in school, and most of all at the university, in a way they never had since then. Now five years had passed and were used. All of them were in some way disappointed as they had not been in school, where each had been able to do what he truly wanted to do. The school had been for them a kind of society very different from the adult society for which it was supposed to prepare them.

—Delmore Schwartz, “The World Is a Wedding” (via suitablesubstituteforwit)


Today at the office they asked me, “Have you ever made a budget?”

"No," I replied. "I don’t think that would interest me very much."

I am not good with money. I do not have anything in my savings account. In fact, I am so reckless with my spending, I often unknowingly swipe my credit card by accident when clocking in at work.